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I Eat Because I'm Horngry

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I Eat Because I'm 'Horn'gry'

Yup... it means what it says! ICYMI: Article from original issue of TL Mag.

TL Mag Beauty · Jan. 7, 2017

Yup! You read the headline correctly! You read it exactly the way I intended for you to. This is my confession. I eat because I’m “horn”gry. *sigh*


One day after sitting on my couch and eating my fourth Culver’s Concrete Mixer in four days, I had to stop and ask myself, “Why are you eating this ice cream like this?”


Over time, after separating from my husband, I realized that I developed a very bad habit - I  began eating any and everything all the time. I couldn’t understand what was going on. I hadn’t connected my sexual frustrations with my overeating until that day I was looking at the fourth concrete mixer feeling ashamed.


As a devout Christian woman, sticking to the principles set forth in the Holy Scriptures, I chose to keep my body holy. My husband had made it clear that it was over between us and fornication, or in my case adultery, was out of the question.


The mind is a powerful tool, subconsciously I didn’t realize I was feeding my sexual desires with a substitute - FOOD! I was too busy praying for my sanity and healing from the hurt of my broken marriage that I wasn’t taking time to deal with the other issues going on within me... I out-right horny... there, I said it. I am not ashamed. I had been married 5 years at this time. Not being able to have sex abruptly without any warning or thought is not an easy thing to conquer.


As Christians, a lot of times we try to paint this picture, that we have it all together. That nothing fazes us because we have the All Mighty God. While we are more than conquerors and we can do all things through Christ who strengthens us, he also told us to cast our cares upon Him. In the areas of sex, I wasn’t doing that. I internalized that desire and pleased myself in a different way.


Maybe you don’t eat because you’re “horn”gry, maybe you have other reasons why you overeat. Or maybe you over-spend because you’re upset about something. Or maybe you binge watch TV because you’re trying to avoid dealing with another situation in your life. Either way it goes you have to ensure that you’re not internalizing situations, but instead casting that care over to God.


When we don’t deal with the issues and put something else in place of it we find ourselves in trouble - or like me with an extra 25 lbs that I’m fighting to lose. Isn’t it great that we have a great Comforter that understands us and is touched with our feelings? God simply told me to put the fork down and give to him those desires - yes, even my sexual desires.


Say this quick prayer if you find yourself internalizing issues: Father God, in the name of Jesus. Please help me to see the things that I am internalize and help me to willingly hand them over to you for a complete healing. Amen!


UPDATE: I've gain 60 lbs since the writing of this article in 2015. I started eating for other reasons, but I'm working on getting the weight off.


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